[00:00:00] Speaker A: In this power half an hour, you will be filled from the bottom to the top of your cup or your body, your mind, your spirit, your soul, your all of the things.
[00:00:09] Speaker B: Welcome to coaching cocktails and conversations with Lolita E. Walker, the podcast that coaches you up while meeting you exactly where you are. Grab your water, tea, or something stronger and allow this podcast to help you feel the power in your cause. Come on in and join the conversation.
[00:00:31] Speaker A: Let's go.
Hey, everybody. Hey. I am Lolita E. Walker. I'm a certified life leadership and executive coach. I'm also a power speaker, author, poet, podcaster. You name it, I'm doing it. But when I come here intentionally for this half an hour of pure power and then conversations, it's just the juiciness of what we are going to do here. The beauty is that we are on a live platform. Hey, to my clubhouse peeps and breakfast with champions. I absolutely love being here with you all. You push me to mountains that I didn't even know existed. So I appreciate you Facebook coaching, cocktails and conversations. If you're not a part of that, go ahead and come on in the room. LinkedIn and YouTube. I'm so excited to be here. And of course, my podcast, family coaching cocktails and conversations today. Are you ready for the topic? I'm so excited about it. How navigating thoughts can increase your leadership. That's today's topic, how navigating your thoughts can increase your leadership. Wow, Lolita, how are we going to do that? Well, first, let me say hello to Dr. Jeannie. Hey, Dr. Jeannie. She said, I am ready for this topic. She is on LinkedIn and I also think on Clubhouse. So excited about that. And we have two Facebook users. I can't see your name, but you said, good morning, there's a sun. And you said, good morning, there is a heart right there. So I want to say hello to each and every one of you all. I also looked down at my phone and what do I see? Who do I see? Dr. Sean Shapiro. I'm so excited to see him. I talk about him often, everyone, because I talk about my PhD journey. I talk about talking about your dreams out loud and saying them. And there's always somebody that is listening and going to push you to be bigger, better, bolder. And I talk about Dr. Sean Shapiro. But I don't want to embarrass him. I want to get on a topic. We only have a power half an hour, and so let's go ahead and get into the topic. I'm leaving you with eight considerations. You all, I'm leaving you with eight considerations today about your thoughts, and I want to take you on this journey with me.
I love the journey of just being pictorial, and so I want to take you on this journey with me. The topic is how navigating thoughts can increase your leadership. Well, let's talk a little bit. I talked to my friend, my best friend Google, before I got on here with you all today for some definitions to help us walk through this thing. What I love about these sessions is that you walk away with something tangible. And so as you close your eyes and think about navigating your thoughts so that you can ultimately increase your leadership, I want to talk to you about this word of navigation, right? Navigation is directing your way across, along and over, according to my best friend, Google. Right. So as we talk navigating, it's directing your way across, over, along all of these places and spaces. And we know that obstacles will come along the way. So when I think navigating, I'm thinking a path. If you look at the front of my first book, the intersection of you and change, that is a navigating a path, and you get to this intersection and you have to think, am I going to go left? Am I going to go right? Am I going to go forward? Am I going to stay complacent? Am I going to choose to go backward because I know what's back there? Navigation. So we're moving, we're directing our path. So I'm saying, how can navigating your thoughts well, Lolita, how am I going to navigate my thoughts well, if I'm telling you that you're on a path inside of this power, half an hour and you're walking and you're directing yourself and you're moving along this well, how can you move along your thoughts well, your thoughts is this place that is using your mind to consider something. So now I'm navigating this space, and now I'm using my mind to consider the greatness, to consider where I'm going to go, to consider the next steps, to consider what is it that I am going to do inside of this place, in this space? Where is it that I am going then? I'm saying we're going to navigate your thoughts so that you can increase your leadership. So when I think about leadership, it's about motivating yourself and motivating other people toward achieving a common goal. All right. I want you to stick with me because it's important that we understand the words of the topic that I'm talking about today because as you are navigating your own thoughts to increase your own leadership, to get to that common goal of where it is that you're going with that clarity, that confidence and that commitment that I always talk about, then you got to understand all of the pieces to the puzzle. So I'm taking you through this pictorial journey and I want you to insert yourself because I'm already here. I hope you're starting right here with me. I'm already here. And sometimes we're going to have to make choices along our journey, and those choices are going to take us to our next level of elevation. Absolutely. They're going to make us bigger, better, bolder. Sometimes the choices that we make along our journey, we going to find some doors that's going to be closed right there. I see a lot of them all the time. I love that. Hey, Maria. Maria Simoneti said, hey, Lolita. And she said, yes. The greatness, all of the greatness that lay ahead for you, we are navigating the thoughts that can increase our leadership. So now that we know where it is that we're going, we have us on the left hand side, we're going over top of this bridge, and on the right hand side, we have our leadership and the greatness that is there. And through that we are going to navigate our thoughts, our mind and where it's going to increase what I am calling our leadership. This is the thoughts model according to Lolita E. Walker. I work with my clients on this and I want to share it with each and every one of you all today because I think that there's so much power in it. Why? Because I have done it myself. Why? Because I have seen the results of other people walking through this framework. And so what I'm going to share with you today is a little bit of soul work so that you can now empower yourself to navigate your thoughts, to elevate, on the other side, your leadership. You're going to elevate it to new heights, right? We're going to open up our minds to our endless possibilities in the first, because I know you have your coaching, cocktails and conversations journal that is right beside you. If not, you can go to lolitawalker.com. It's there. You could grab it. But the first thing is transparency.
Okay? The first thing is transparency. Are you being transparent on your navigation journey, on your leadership journey? In your thoughts, in your minds? And what does that mean, Lolita? Well, just think about it. Transparency is about being clear. It's about exploring the impact and the clarity of open communications in your leadership stream. Are you trusting? Are you exploring what the impact is? Are you being open? Are you being honest? Are you communicating with intention? Transparency.
Remember that as we navigate this space, as we navigate, sometimes we got to move over the bushes, sometimes we got to leap over the hills. Sometimes we have to knock some things out with the chisel that is right here inside of our toolkit we're walking through and we're navigating this place. And sometimes it's scary, guys.
Sometimes when there's a book that's on the other side and you're celebrating that thing, sometimes it's scary to get there because you're saying things that might draw up some thoughts inside of you. We today are navigating our thoughts so that we can increase our leadership. And sometimes our minds, our thoughts are clouded with all of these things that we are telling ourselves and getting in our own way. So this thoughts framework is helping us to get out of our own way and then navigate the places and spaces to ultimately increase our leadership. I love that someone on Facebook said, I have my journal right next to me. Absolutely. Open it up and let's get these eight written down because I want you to find yourself inside of this place right here. I want you to find yourself right here because there's power in it. Today we're navigating thoughts so that we can increase our leadership. And we started with the transparency of it all. We started with being transparent and being clear in that. And now we're moving to harnessing positivity so it's clear, it's transparent. We're exploring the impact of what our openness can be and really feel like in this communication for this leadership stream that we're on this journey for. We're trusting. There's cohesion, there's openness, there's transparentness, there's clarity in where it is that we're going. We realize that sometimes there's going to be distractions, there's going to be people that tell you no, there's going to be teachers that tell you you can't do this thing. But we're navigating our thoughts because what we know is that we want to harness this place with overall positivity. A positive mindset is going to influence our decision making along our journey. It's not always easy to have a positive mindset, but what if we could do the soul work right now to really help ourselves think through when there's a negative thought that comes into our mind? How can we shift it. When I start to have that self talk that says Lolita, who told you that you're going to get through a doctoral program when you got 80 million things that's going on, when a teacher tells me you're doing too many things and you're going to have to drop something so that you could really do this full time, so that you could really focus on that, and I then tell myself, how are you going to get through this? You're not going to be Dr. Walker on the side of that. No, I have to shift it and say, girl, you are two years into this thing. Yes. We are already on a journey. Congratulations on where it is. Because when I look back, I'm not going back. When I look back at the tears, I'm not going back to that place. It's forward moving. And so what I want to encourage you is that how you navigate these places, there's information, there's people that's not going to be on your side. There's people that's challenging you. And sometimes you got to be able to take it in and say, you know what? You're right on that. I could have put a little bit more work on that.
You're right. I should have paused inside of that moment. But now I hear you, I see you, and I want to put my emotions to the side so that now I can receive you. We are navigating our own thoughts. What did I tell you? That thoughts were using your mind to consider something. I want to consider it differently. I want to take the whole emotional lolita out of it. I want to hear the words that you are saying. I want to receive the ones that's going to power me on my journey, and then I want to use those in order to move me differently.
I love that Sandra on LinkedIn said, we won't go back. Absolutely not. We will not go back. There's too much forward. And when we understand our why, of why we are navigating this place in the first place, that is the power.
When we talk about these things out loud, that is the power. Today we're talking about navigating our thoughts so that we can, will and absolutely will increase our leadership. I love that Maria said, communicating with intention. Yes. Being aware of the purpose and the implication, oh, my gosh, you all are right here inside of my framework already. And I love that someone else on Facebook said, going back is not, in all capital letters, not an option. It's not an option. We're forward facing. I'm two years into this thing. I'm forward facing. Your book that you're writing. I'm already on journal number three. I'm writing it. I'm getting into it. Your doctor just told you that you have a health concern. How are you navigating your thoughts to do something different?
The excuse of I can't get to the gym and maybe you don't have the money to get the membership. Okay. Where your weight can be. That weight that's going to help you. The push up that you could do on a side of your bed, the ten that you can do on the side of your bed when you get up. The ten jumping jacks, you can do. The downward dog, you could do the marching in place. You can do. No. How are you navigating these mountains that we are putting in front of ourselves so that we can increase the leadership not only for us but for our teams?
How are we doing that? Come on, you guys. I am absolutely gifting you this framework because I want you to make sure that you can navigate the thoughts that come into your places and your spaces yourself. Your, you, that head of yours, that thing, we got to unwind it. We got to move away the brush because there's other things on the other side of this that we are going to do it. I love that someone on the Facebook side said the free YouTube workouts. Absolutely.
There's so many amazing workouts. You can go on demand on your tv and do that. I love that. Another Facebook user said, transparency is a very necessary step in this process.
Dora Maria on clubhouse said, don't live in woulda, shoulda, coulda start when looking in the mirror first, with kindness, with grace. I love that. Dora Maria so today we're talking about navigating thoughts that can increase your leadership. I'm taking you through what I call Lolita's thoughts framework. And so we've already talked about transparency and harnessing our positivity and now we're talking about open mindedness. We're talking about open mindedness. We're talking about not closing the door yourself. Like you are not the one closing the door. Somebody else might want to close the door. And because we're navigating that space, we're going to walk all the way on the other side of that. We're going to bust down the door. Sometimes you don't even have to bust down the door. You only have to actually turn it because they didn't even lock the door. They just closed it thinking that you're going to turn back. No, you're going to actually turn it and you're going to walk through it. You're going to walk through it with your head held high. We're navigating these thoughts that we have so that we can increase the leadership on the other side. We are being determined, we're being clear, we're being focused. We're being open minded, because sometimes on the other side of that door is power, is greatness. And it might not look like what we think it was going to look like in the first think. I'm sure I told you guys a story about.
I always had this vision. Anytime I see a billboard on the side of the road, and it was really in New York, Times Square. And I remember my line, Sister Carla B. She was with me one time. We were in New York having fun for just a weekend, and we walked through Times Square and I was like, I'm going to be on one of these billboards. I don't know for the reason that I'm going to be on a billboard. I don't know. But I'm telling you that I want to see myself on a billboard because I know I'm making impact. And somewhere along the line, I'm going to be on a billboard. Now, in my mind, I wanted it to be in the middle of Times Square. Right? That's where I am. I know. I'm getting there. I've talked to you guys about wanting to meet Robin Roberts, and I just had this whole entire vision. And so where I'm going with this is sometimes when it comes, it doesn't look like exactly what you envision. But guess what? I said I wanted to be on a billboard, and next thing you know, years later, I'm running for an elected official. Yeah, I'm on a billboard. All down and up the streets, people calling me. I saw you on a billboard. You're running for office.
It didn't look like what I thought it was going to look like, but the intention of my face being on the side of a road or up on big poster so that people could understand the impact that I was bringing into the world. Check, you're done.
That's only one way that you can navigate this thing. And it wasn't even what I thought. It doesn't mean that Times Square isn't coming. It means that, wow, I have to go back and I have to look at how I was imagining how my mind had me up on this billboard, how impact was so important to me, how me living in my gifts were so important to me. How me leveraging my strengths that's why I talk to you all, all the time about what are your top three strengths? Know them, trust them, believe them. I love that Dr. Jimmy said, oh, you will be on a billboard. Yes. Billboard, yes. I love that another Facebook user said, when I think about navigating, I think about a gps going past self. Jackie said that, absolutely. You think about navigation, you think about your gps. Here's the thing with your gps. How do you start? You put the address in of where it is that you're going again, your clarity, your confidence and your commitment. When you know where it is that you're going, then you're going to get there. You got to take some left, some rights. If you use ways like I do, sometimes you go down these alleys and you're like, I've never even been on this side of town before. But you get to your final destination and you get there faster. Maybe somebody knows something you don't already know. Today we're talking about how navigating your thoughts can increase your leadership. Well, how can it increase your leadership, Lolita? Well, I've already told you that leadership is really all about motivating others and motivating yourself to get to that in state. And if that's what leadership is, then that's exactly what we're talking about elevating. It's talking about knowing that people are going to follow you. Because why you are standing up as a leader in every single thing that you do today is about clearing out the weeds, knocking out the doors, knowing that sometimes the door that's in front of you, you shut yourself knowing that when somebody else shut the door with a. No, just open it. Just turn the lock. Sometimes it's not even locked. And even if it is, you already possess the key. Go inside of your toolkit kit, grab it, open it up.
No. Is setting you up for the yes, that's right. On the other side of that, we've talked about transparency. We've talked about harnessing positivity. We talked about being open minded. Because sometimes on the other side of it, it doesn't look exactly how Lolita envisioned it. It doesn't look exactly how Christina or Ramon envisioned it, but it is. You're living it. You're living this thing right now.
My power I didn't know was going to be on a doctoral journey. My power I didn't know was going to be in four books. My power I didn't know was going to be with me saying, can we talk?
My power every single day, you are leveraging your power. You are using your power to navigate your thoughts and increase the level of leadership. It's amazing. It's so powerful. Next, we want to understand others inside of this framework.
Understand others by using empathy.
By using empathy. You want to actually listen, to understand. You want to listen intently. I want to understand others because I don't know it all I'm learning and I'm growing in this thing called life, and so I'm navigating my thoughts to increase my leadership. But in the process, I want to understand others because others might be able to help me on my journey. I want to understand others because when I understand others, when I'm reading, when I'm increasing my mindset, when I'm increasing the knowledge that I'm pouring in, when I'm reading, when I'm understanding, when I'm going to webinars, when I'm joining someone else on their platform, when I'm understanding what it is that different people bring to the table inside of their skill sets, then I'm arming myself, I'm powering myself with this new, with this improved navigation. I love that Jackie actually talked about the GPS. Sometimes you got to update your gps, sometimes you got to update your gps because new roads get added all of the time. There's new options all of the time. You might have never thought about writing a book, but because you have the right people inside of your circle and you're seeing how they're impacting with that. When I wrote my first book, the intersection of you and change, it was because I was navigating so much in my life. I had so much change at the time, and I literally started journaling. But what I knew on the other side of that is I needed something for my coaching practice to be able to use for soul work with my clients. I wanted to be able to use that. And I was showing up at events and I didn't have anything tangible to be able to give to people, and so I wanted something tangible that had some meat inside of it. So that's how my book started. That's Lolita's story about my book and how my book started and had its wings. I was also going through so much change in my life. So again, I just started journaling. I didn't know that was going to turn into a book, but people started asking me, Lolita, how are you navigating all of this? How are you getting through it? And I would give them this soul work activities, this work, this work to do. Why? Because I was doing the work and because people were coming to me. What are people coming to you all for? You guys on this way of navigating your journey? People are coming to you. People are meeting you along your road. People are asking you the same questions over and over again. Like, what are those questions people are asking you over and over again? Guess what, guys? That's what you're giving to the world. That thing right there, that's what people want from you. That's it is your gift is they're coming to you because you gift it so naturally. That thing right there is your business. That thing right there is your gift. Name it, own it. We're navigating the thought so that we can increase our leadership.
Goal setting is the next piece inside of this framework. Goal setting. Being smart on your goals. Clarity plus confidence equals commitment. According to Lolita E. Walker, my three C's is aligning yourself and your teams towards your success. Set your goals. Know what they are at the end state. What is it, where are you going and why? I love that someone said, hey, yeah, I want to be clear on where it is that I'm going. A Facebook user said, let the light pass through in a way that others behind you can see the path clearly and distinctively. Oh, my gosh. So good. Let your light shine through and pass through so that other people can actually see that as well. I love that we're not only navigating it for ourselves, but we're navigating it for the other people that are coming behind us. You got to make sure you're turning around in your navigation journey. Like, as you're walking through and you're moving the brushes out of the way, you got to make sure you turn around and grab someone who is right beside you or right behind you or following your footsteps. Turn around and say, oh, my gosh, Jackie, guess what? Look what I found. Oh, my gosh, Stacey. Look what I found. Come over here. Let me move this over for you because I've been through it and I want to help you on your journey.
Healthy boundaries is the next. I'm looking at the time. Healthy boundaries. Right, healthy boundaries. Set those healthy boundaries for yourself. Examine the importance of where it is that you're going. Absolutely. And set those boundaries. What am I going to say? Own your yes and respect your no. I got so many orders for that shirt the other day. You guys. Own your yes and respect your no. I believe in it so much that I have it on sweatshirts, I have it on journals, I have it on t shirts. Why? Own your yes respect your no. Sometimes your no is the yes that you need to push forward. Sometimes your no is the power that you need to get that next thing done. Sometimes we're only looking in front of us. Guys, stop looking at the very next step. I want you to look ten steps out. Ramon, if you were listening the other week, was saying that he sent a note that he wanted to interview Lisa Nichols, and the door came back and it was closed like, no. But he looked inside of his friend Rolodex and was like, oh, wait a minute, I got a name that somebody might think is a little bigger than mine. It's just because they don't know Ramon Ray yet. But that's okay, they're bad. But let me go ahead and put who I think they might know in front of them so that then the answer now becomes a yes.
Oh, my gosh. We need to have healthy boundaries, and we need to then be thoughtful in our decision making. The decision making is a process. So what did he do? He thought through it and said, wait a minute, this door might be closed, but let me grab my key, let me open up the door, because that's endless. And my door of contacts is vast. And so what I want to do is, even if I didn't know the person, I want to call somebody who might know somebody that can get me inside of this place. Yes, I will get the yes, I got a door closed on this one. But let me think about the creative ways that I can be enticing to the person on the other end. Why is. Because I know on the other end of this thing is the rundown with Ramon. Done and done. I'm getting there. I'm moving things out of my way. And then your self awareness, dive into the role of being self aware, in your leadership, in understanding what your strengths are and recognizing those. And so, as I go through this framework, this Lolita's thoughts framework, then I say this to you. But as I work with my clients, of course, we go one by one by one. And the power of this navigation, this blueprint, this journey that you will get yourself on the other side of, is that it's not today or tomorrow. This thing is a process. You're always working on it. And because you're fueling yourself, right? I talked about fueling yourself in your train before, because you're fueling yourself to go, because you're powering yourself, because you're doing those push ups on the side of the bed, because you're leveraging other free resources, because you're paying for webinars to go to because you're pushing these things inside of your mind, then you will grow, you will navigate your thoughts to increase your leadership. And so I have three minutes.
I just looked at the clock. My bad, y'all. I was fueling you guys this morning. But if there's something that someone wants to add, then please feel free.
I don't want to add to it. I just want to compliment you for always adding so much value to this space. This is just what I needed to hear. This is the fresh motivation that I needed today. And you do such an exceptional, great job. Oh, thank you. Absolutely. You are of quality.
I appreciate. I've always admired you, and I just want to just give you your flowers and ask that you always show to the space we need, your type of quality, energy, and motivation. So thank you for always doing a great job. Oh, Veronica, you have made my day, honey. You have been on my navigation highway. So thank you so much. Sometimes this is a perfect example. Thank you so much, Veronica. Sometimes along your journey, somebody will step up and give you your flowers, give you a cheers, tell you how they're impacting you, telling you that, hey, inside of this moment, you gave me the energy that I needed. You woke me up just a little bit. And I appreciate that. I appreciate the way you do that thing because why? Sometimes along our journey, we got to pack that power, we got to pack that positivity. Because there will be a place along our navigation. Remember, this is a journey, you guys. There's going to be twists. There's going to be turns. If you're watching me on any of the platforms and you see my hands all moving all around, because the navigation is real, sometimes you got to sit inside of that moment along your trail and you just sit there for a minute. Who's the lady you wanted to be on tv with? What's her name? Oh, yes. Robin Roberts. Who knows? Robin claiming all of that right now. You guys, listen. Robin Roberts is on Good Morning America, in case you don't know who it is I'm speaking of. And I have this affiliation with the local channel seven because it's on channel seven where I am in a DMV area. And I have been on channel seven local news a while, right? A couple of years here and there. And so they reached out to me to come on in December, and I'll be talking about how to navigate a holiday stress, right? So I'll tell you guys when I'll be on. It'll be early December sometime. But how to navigate holiday stress. I think it's next week. I'm so excited about it because every time I go to the studio, I say I'm one step closer to Robin. I'm one step closer to Robin. So I'm saying all of that to tell you that we got to keep an eye out on Robin Roberts, y'all. And so I cannot wait to see that. Maria said, I briefly worked with Robin at NBC when I lived in New York City. Maria, this is it. This is it. I'm so excited. So I'm going to reach out to Maria, but thanks to you guys, it is 801 and I am so excited. Go to lolitawalker.com. I can't wait to collaborate with you all. And that is it. But thank you so much. Look at that. Talk about your dreams and they too shall come.
I appreciate you guys. Do you want me to call Robin for you? Yes. Whoever said that on Facebook? Yes.
[00:28:36] Speaker B: We have concluded yet another episode of coaching, cocktails and conversations, the podcast with Lolita E. Walker. Connect with
[email protected] for speaking, coaching and my books. The intersection of you and change. And can we talk letters and poems to reclaim a bolder you listen. Have you already grabbed your CCNC garb?
Yes, we are coming with tumblers, stimulus glasses, a journal, a hoodie, and don't forget the t shirt. We are leaning all the way in. We also know that coaching, cocktails and conversations is a movement. Not only is it paraphernalia, not only is it this powerful podcast that you have right here in this right now, but it is a Zoomcast. It is a coaching community. It is a Facebook group. It is a clubhouse group. Go ahead and lean into lolitawalker.com to see all things coaching, cocktails and conversations. And next time bring a friend. Invite them to like, to share and to give that five star review. Cheers. I cannot wait to see you back around my kitchen table for coaching, cocktails and conversations. The podcast with Lolita E. Walker.
Yes.
